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One thousand, one hundred and eleven years ago, Tsaar Simeon I the Great sealed his five most annoying concubines in a narrow crate and ordered them buried underneath his tomb. In the present day, the Portland Art Museum, cracked the ancient sarcophagus, freeing nimble maidens for the time in centuries. They are now evading authorities, sleeping in shifts in an undisclosed Puddletown studio, looking for eligible bachelor Tsaars in the Pacific NW.
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